FSA Account Hell

I’m going to rail on something that will make me look 80 years old, crazy, or both.  But here goes...  This is what my life has been reduced to.

Employer offers benefit of a Healthcare FSA account. These are those deals where you pay regularly in to an account, every pay period during the year, up to an amount of your choosing, and they hold this amount out of your “taxable earnings”. It’s earmarked for healthcare use only.

Well, our family has unfortunately been part of the medical equivalent of a “Frequent Customer Club” the last couple years, so we decided to use one of these to get essentially that dubious benefit of less taxation back to our pockets.

Here’s how our experience progressed:

2009 - July 2012 : Yay! We love our FSA account

July 2012 - present: WTF were we thinking?

There apparently was a $0.44 charge -- yes, forty-four cents -- that a doctor’s office found from 2011 and tacked onto a bill I paid this year, unbeknownst to me. Shock-a-roo, it was not covered in the 2012 plan once the FSA administrators identified it.

I have been trying to clear this damn $0.44 charge for about a month now, between calling/recalling the medical center, getting new itemized receipts, submitting them, talking to customer service.

“I just want to pay you back the $0.44.” I begged the reps. 

“Sorry, ma’am, we can’t accept a payment of that size.” the rep responded.

“But this could cause my FSA debit card to freeze up, right?” I queried.

“Yes, ma’am.”

“…”

“Can you ask the healthcare provider for ANOTHER receipt?” rep asks helpfully.

I am in purgatory. I’m certain of it.

Resubmitted the same (but new! version) of the receipt as commanded. Rejected 3 days later. As expected.

Called back AGAIN today, and now I’m suggested to buy a random thing with cash for at least a dollar, that is covered by FSA… but doesn’t require an Rx (Thanks for that little adjustment to the FSA plans in the Healthcare Bill!  Sooooo helpful!)… “… Hmm, but getting an Rx for over the counter items would likely cause you to incur other expense from the doctor…” rep said.  (Yes, I know.)

Band-Aids.

The latest rep throws out this suggestion as an afterthought.  Apparently this is covered, and is one of the few remaining items that doesn’t require an Rx.

So at lunchtime, I am going to get some friggin Band-Aids! 

I don't care WTF character is on them, a box of these is coming with me today.